I've been on a self-improvement kick recently, but I've been working at it slowly for a long time. Part of that has been overcoming my fears. But fears to me, for a long time, have differed from my anxieties.
I was (am) afraid of heights, so I'd go up the rappel tower an extra turn.
I was (am) afraid of needles, so I became a Combat Lifesaver (not so I'd have to stick others with IVs, but because you have to be a practice dummy, too).
I was (am) afraid of pain, so I push myself at PT, I get stuck with needles as a practice dummy for IVs, I make myself not wince when I have a minor ache or bump.
But I have anxiety about my personal thoughts and feelings, things that aren't physical. I know that these stem from fears, fear of rejection, fear of ridicule, shame of stupidity, fear of being unloved.
These are the fears that I find most daunting. These are the fears I'm struggling with now.
But, I've recently found my faith in the face of adversity and sorrow. The Lord *does* lift up my spirit, and I feel buoyed. But not all the time. That's the faith I have to work on, and it *is* in opposition to these fears and anxieties.
Thank you for writing this.