For Zach

April 30, 1984. I barely remember what happened, yet parts of it are so distinctly clear. Grandma had come over and everyone was frantically running around the house that afternoon. Mom had told me that we had to go to the hospital because it was time to meet my new baby sister or brother.

I remember thinking how neat it would be to have a baby sister. I could teach her everything. We could watch countless hours of Scooby Doo and Fraggle Rock. She would definately be Velma, and I would be Daphne. We could play house. I would even share my Barbie dolls with her. Well, okay, let's be honest, most of my Barbie dolls. I would definately keep the one that Mom gave the haircut to in hopes that she would resemble Cyndi Lauper....

We rushed to the hospital. Mom said that Dad would meet us there. The second we arrived Mom was taken away, and Grandma and Grandpa took me to go get a popcicle. As they started speaking to eachother in that weird way that I couldn't understand anything they said (a language I now know as "Italian"), I wondered what it would be like when my sister actually got here.

I recall sitting in the waiting room for what seemed to be an eternity. My green popcicle was long gone. Just then, the doctor came in and told us that I had a baby brother named Zachary.

A BROTHER?! NOT A SISTER?! HOW COULD THIS BE?!

Years later, my little brother would follow me everywhere. He even made up an annoying nickname for me. He would call me, "Honney." (not quite honey, it sounded more like hoe-knee). Whenever Ric came over to play, Zach had to be there shouting "Honney! Honney! " Whenever I wanted to be alone and play with my Barbie's, Zach had to be there. Whenever I got a new toy to play with, I had to share it with him. Having a brother started to become irritating. He was like my shadow.

Next thing I knew, it was time to go to Kindergarden. I remember being very afraid. I didn't know anyone. The second I got to class, I sat there and cried. I missed my "shadow." It was the first time in my life I wished that my brother was there to keep me company.

From that second on, I realized that I needed my brother. He brought me out of my shell. Even though he was irritating, he was all I had. Who knew if I'd even see these kids tomorrow? I would always see Zach.

Growing up, Zach and I remained very close. We rarely fought. He was Velma and I was Daphne (I don't know how much he'd like that now!). I played with my Barbies (and Jem dolls) and he incorporated his G.I. Joes. We rode our bikes everywhere. When we moved, he introduced me to all of the neighborhood kids. When we got older we used to sneak in episodes of Beavis and Butthead together and make prank phonecalls.

When I first went to college, I really missed having him around. I would call home and just cry about how I missed everyone. My brother would call me every day and tell me some stupid thing he did at school. He always cheered me up. He even came and visited me during little siblings weekend. I think the day was actually meant for small kids, but there he was. By this time he was 16, at least a foot taller than me, yet I would always be his big sister.

Boy have times changed.....

In 2001, I recall being home from school on Christmas break and Zach told me that this girl was leaving him notes at work. He said that she would randomly show up every day and just leave little notes. He had no idea who she was, but she wanted him to meet her out at the mall that evening. Since it was a school night, he was only allowed to stay out until 9. At 9, mom and I looked at eachother and wondered where in the world he was. This was not like Zach, he was always home 5 minutes early. 20 minutes then passed, still no Zach. An hour passed, and he still wasn't home. We began to worry. At this point mom was furious, so she put on her shoes, started up the car, and set out to look for him.

45 minutes later, Mom and Zach returned. I remember Mom screaming about how he was being irresponsible and he was never allowed to see that girl again.

Of course for a teenager, saying no is just asking for a rule to be broken. Zach would go behind everyone's back and see this girl. Her name was Brenna. She was a year older than him. She happened to notice him bagging groceries one day, and apparently stalked him from then on out. Zach, being young and dumb thought her advances were sweet and saw her as often as possible. Soon it came out in the wash that he was seeing her, and at this point there was no stopping it.

Then she became pregnant.

Everyone was so shocked.

Then it gets worse....

She didn't know who the father was.

At this point, Zach was furious because A) she lied about being on birth control and

she cheated on him

He stood by her. He said that if the child was his, he would take full responsibility.

On October 11. 2002 (ironically enough my mom's 50th birthday) Elizabeth Louise R*** was brought into the world. The test was taken and the results were in favor of my brother being the father.

Ever since, Brenna has taken total control over Zach. She threatens that if he ever leaves her that he will never be allowed to see that child. She is unemployed and makes him pay for everything. He has paid for over $300 in tatoos for Brenna, and who knows how much clothes and credit card bills. She uses my niece to threaten him, He pays for everything for that child.

One day I basically told Brenna to fuck off, and now Zach and I hardly speak. He is not himself anymore. He is full of anger and anxiety.He's miserable. I am afraid that one day I will be cut off from seeing him or my niece at all.

I miss my brother.

Why is it that a majority of good guys are stuck in the evil clutches of a bitchy woman?

Locked Post

Advanced Search

Watch this post

Do not email me updates for this post Email me updates for this post

Successfully updated karma reason!

Why is it that a majority of good guys are stuck in the evil clutches of a bitchy woman?

The reason is in your question. Good guys like to be good. We take responsibility when we mess up and we try to make everything work. The problem is with the bitchy woman...she takes advantage of the good nature that so many women crave.

*sigh* Maybe someday you can get your brother out of that situation...just try and stay close to him, even with that bitch around.

~Zoo

Successfully updated karma reason!

{{{{{{{alison}}}}}}} a hug because MM is at a lose for words.

Successfully updated karma reason!

~She threatens that if he ever leaves her that he will never be allowed to see that child. She is unemployed and makes him pay for everything.
He has paid for over $300 in tatoos for Brenna, and who knows how much clothes and credit card bills.
She uses my niece to threaten him, He pays for everything for that child.~

Wow...Isn't there something in the law that says she cannot prevent him from seeing her if he pays child support?
If he leaves her and agrees to pay child support, and if he is a good father to this child, I don't think she can take that right away...
maybe someone else here might be more knowledgeable in child custody laws and parental rights.

Successfully updated karma reason!