I never want to hear that you can do it better
I can feel myself getting stronger everyday.
I know I can do this but I hate being in it alone.
I wake up in the morning to start my day. I look in the mirror as i rinse my face befre i cover up with the everyday make up. Im not ugly, but I'm not pretty. All I can say is that I am plain. I have no idea what i can do to change this plainness.
I start with the foundation to make my skin look flawless. Then I put on the powder to help bring the color to my face so that i dont look like the ghost that i feel like everyday. I finish by painting my eyes an lips so that I look halfway descent. Once my face is done my hair gets pulled back half down half up, and my bangs pulled to the side.
My bestfriends were my jackets and my jeans since I rarely wear anything else.
At this point I'm ready for work, but I still have way more to do before I can even walk out the door. I walk into another room turning on the lights.
As soon as i do i hear the whining start. He never wants to get up but its the only thing other than I that is steady in his life.
I pick up my whining two year old and let him know that its going to be all right. Once he finally gets his small body all stretched out and as awake as he can I can finally change his clothes. He always wants juice, and hates it when its cold.
I pack a bag for him. My purse for me. A lunch for me, and make sure he has his jacket on.
Making sure i have my phone and car keys I carry all that out before. He cries because i left him in the house alone. I come to get him in the car he doesnt want to go because its to cold. I have to grab an extra blanket before i can finally put him in the car.
Once that is done I have to go back to lock up the house. Its still cold in the car so he is upset. Now that he is upset he isnt goint to stop. So I have to listen to him cry over my morning show all the way to day care which is a 30 Minuet drive.
Now at daycare he doesnt want to stay.
I finally get him settled into daycare where he is no longer crying and now that has made me late to work.
Getting to work is amazing its 9 hours of not having a screaming child in your ear. I am thankful for these 9 hours because it makes me thankful for the time i get after I get out of work.
Finally the work day has ended i am exhausted, and ready to see my baby. picking him up from daycare he is already upset when i set him in the car, because he is hungry. So he is mad all the way home.
Once i get home it is a peanut butter sandwhich for the baby so that i can get dinner started. But he ate the sandwich to fast and now he is crying at my feet as I try to get dinner done. My mother coming home is probably the best part of my day. She either takes over the cooking or takes over the baby.
When we sit for dinner and listen to the members of my family eating then I feel that its all worth it for a minuet.
Once dinner is over the argument over who is doing the dishes starts. I have to give the baby a bath because of the mess that he made at the table while eating. Once i have him in that bath i can sit back and try to message the friends that have been trying to get ahold of me for hours.
Now that he is bathed and fully clothed i get him a cup of milk to drink. As he is drinking his milk I finish off the dishes, and maybe put in a load of laundry.
After his milk i have to brush his teeth. Once his teeth are brushed then its time for bed. Thats a fight all on its own, Its a constant battle of putting him in bed and him getting up laying him back down and him getting back up.
Once he is finally asleep its probably about 9:15-9:30. I have to get a quick shouwer in. I would love to have a long bath but i have to be up early so i get dressed and head for bed.
I dont like hearing people tell me your kid is two you shouldnt be tired anymore. Or that your only a mom what is so bad about that. Its frusterating when people dont really understand what it is like.