They have been missing for days,
A family disappeared without a clue,
The whole town has been fazed,
And the police don't know what to do.
Do you know how easy it was to excute my plan?
It's because I'm fucking perfect,
I took, stole the whole damn clan,
Without this chef ever being a suspect.
Volunteers have joined in the search,
Even the Feds have climb aboard,
And the good people of the church,
Have even offered a reward.
I was out there leading the hunt,
Pleading on TV with every chance,
And later when I will saw my stunt,
I laughed till I pissed my pants.
It was all for naught,
They found their chopped off heads,
The killer will never be caught,
The FBI are positive he has fled.
Cutting off a head is easier than it seems,
Too bad there was only 4 lives,
Each skull came off clean,
With just a few swings from my cooking knives.
Biggest funeral the town ever saw,
Four cold grey caskets sealed,
Then they shared stories about them all,
Eulogies spoken at a church meal.
I fed the town my famous stew,
I say this to all those sinners,
The victims will always be with you,
Because tonight you ate them for dinner.