So, admittedly we talk about strange things--that's one of the things I like the most about this New One. I can't remember how we got into a discussion about men faking orgasms, but he informed me that yes, it is done, and yes, he has done it. Apparently, it's REALLY easy to fake it when you're wearing a condom and still doable if you're not. As for the why: well, if you're tired of having sex, like literally tired and need to rest. If you don't think you're going to come at all, or for a long time. If you sense that she just wants it to be over. If you're just DONE.
I mention this to my friend Kitty. "Oh yeah," she says, "they fake it. It's great, i mean, if you've had your fun and you're ready to stop, and they sense that and fake it because they're not going to come or whatever, I think that's very thoughtful." (Both of us are from the south, so YES, the whole concept of faking an orgasm to be polite, thoughtful, and courteous is not only legitimate, but charming and sweet.)
But after this Faking discussion with New Boyfriend, when we have sex, it's there, in the back of my mind. Any orgasm that doesn't strike me as COMPLETELY legit, i wonder about for a split second. Not like "Bastard! I know that was all an act!" But more like "Hmmm...did that seem a little contrived? Did he....?"
And then one night, I faked it. So of course then i'm wondering...did HE fake it too? Are we both faking orgasms? How freaking funny is that? And you know what? I SO don't care. New Boyfriend is so dramatic, he probably gets immense pleasure out of a good fake performance. I know I do. And I know what the alternative is, thanks to undramatic Old Boyfriend, who would just stop fucking sometimes, look at me, and say "I'm going to rest for a minute. OK?" Honest, yes. But I'll tell you. I'd rather hear "Oh my god you feel so good...i'm gonna come...i'm coming..." Every time--real or not.
