By the way, that buckle is friggin' awesome.

-- B

I have scrupples!  I cannot be bought!

But my rent is reasonable.

"vacancy"

HAHAHAHHAHAHA

Trinitie

oh my.

wow.

muggaz, my dear, how do you find these things?

ok, these are absolutely fantastic! I will let you all know how I go with the respective quips!

i am in hysterics here!

My dear boy it sounds like you are a smelly poverty stricken peasant if you must "work" for through the winter.
I thought you had atleast the outer trappings of class, you seemed like a rather loyal Maxwellian but now it is clear that you
are a poverty stricken pleb. Perhaps I should fly my son Richard down to Victoria to warm you up.
forcefully yours,
Sir Peter Maxwell

Wow I want one. Now to the quips:

"Going down?"

"Pull down tab A, pump handle vigourously until fully inflated and insert into slot B."

"Subliminal message with suggestive undertones..."

"Hi, my name is John Thomas. I'm pleased to MEAT you..."

"SOS. Help me! I'm trapped, let me out."

"Not tonight, I've got a headache."

"What's the matter, never seen one before?!"

"Don't feel too bad, I'm staring at your tits."

"It's alive."

"Want the chance to win instant prizes. See inside the pack for details."

"If you think this is tacky you should see my bedroom."

"He treats me like a mushroom, he keeps me in the dark and feeds me shit."

"See how far you've sunk."

"Caution: White Load."

"Gone fishing, back in 2 weeks."

"Internal pressure: 250psi and rising...I think he likes you."

"Have you lost something down here, or just found something you like?"

"Give me some slack, this is a stressful job."

"If you're naughty I'll hit you."

"Redlight district: zoned for adult services."

Oops, I got a bit carried away there.

Thanks Muggaz and LW, having too much free time has finally paid-off.

" I taught your girlfriend that thing you like"
"Put my willy wonka in your chocolate factory"
"could you come back in a few beers time?"
"If you're already this close, why don't you just suck my dick"
"i'm pretty smooth with the ugly chicks"

I like Sally's, too.

Here is some more.

"I Support Single Moms"
"Your sister is hot but your mom does that thing with her tongue"
"I stole this belt buckle from a homeless guy - why he had a belt buckle that say this, I'll never know"
"Also available in sober"
"I'm what Willis was talkin' about"
"The funniest thing about this belt buckle is that by the time you realize it doesn't say anything it's too late for you to stop reading it you dumb ass"
"I'm the new Pope - who wants to go to heaven?"
"I'm huge in Japan"
"Don't neglect the balls"
"Please pay before pumping"
"I'd only end up hurting you"
"Easy like Sunday morning"
"I came on Eileen"
"To: Women From: God"
"Atkins Approved"

Perhaps for poops and chuckles you could offer the following definition(s) of "Canadian Belt Buckle" from urbandictionary.com:(www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=canadian+belt+buckle)

1. Canadian Belt Buckle 7 up, 1 down

When one puts his or her penis up at their waistline wear the head of the penis sticks out. Try it at parties.

"Dude, check it out, his (sic) sporting a Canadian Belt Buckle."
Source: Jtron 3000, Sep 8, 2003

Also: "Beltbuckle", as in

1. Canandian Beltbuckle 2 up, 1 down

When you put your hard-on up between your stomach and wasitline of your pants so the top comes out. Helps protect from the dreaded "Pitchin' a Tent" look. Do not use if shirtless.

"I popped a boner in class so I used the old canadian beltbuckle manuver to get out with dignity."
Source: Jtron 3000, Oct 1, 2003

OK, one more:

1. Canadian bobsled 1 thumb up

Right before the moment of ejaculation whilst having doggy style the male reaches around and knocks out the girls hands from under her.

"I knocked out her hands and rode her like a Canadian bobsled"
Source: therealhambone, Aug 24, 2004

Onward, etc.,
David St. Hubbins

nice one A

it hasn't arrived yet, but the boys are all counting down... this is going to be good.