Texas Wahine

Join Date 08/2004

+127

What Happened to Me?

I have never been a particularly beautiful woman. Unfortunately, I am stuck with what genetics dealt me.

Over the past few years, but especially most recently, I am noticing a marked decline in my aesthetics. I am way too young for all this to be happening!

A few years ago I developed a nice double chin. This is the most stubborn double chin in the history of mankind. Its prominence is reduced by weight loss (and I could definitely use some of that), but it does not go away. It just gets less noticable. From the front, it's a double chin. From the side, it's like a weak chin...you know how normal necks and jaws create an angle from the side? Not mine. It's like a sloping curve from my neck all the way to my chin. This disturbs me greatly.

I used to have nice skin. It has always been very, very pale (which I learned to be ok with), but it was nice and smooth and supple and mostly blemish-free. Now I get zits. My skin isn't radiant or smooth or lovely.

I am seeing the beginnings of wrinkles on my forehead. My undereyes are getting thin and saggy like an old lady's.

My fat used to hold itself in much better. Now it doesn't even care anymore. It just wobbles whereever it likes. I've even worn shapewear under sweatpants to combat this wayward fat problem. Yes, weight loss is a good solution for this, but my body doesn't like to lose weight anymore. Efforts that used to drop the pounds no longer have any effect.

My average-looking belly button lost its allure after my first child. Models have lovely vertical belly buttons. My belly button winks. This is also not affected by weight loss in the slightest. My belly button has given up.

I noticed a weird feeling bump on the back of my neck near my hairline the other day. Adrian checked it out and pronounced it some sort of medical term for a weird lump of fatty tissue that does not go away.

Just one of the myraid of body disappointments I'm having to accept.

My boobs aren't what they used to be. Year by year they grow larger. Disturbingly so. I was in a D cup by late JR High. I am now in a HH. The fitting ladies at the store put me in a 32 band. Now, I am not a small 32 person. This bra is as tight as...something that is really tight. Unfortunately, this tightness is what keeps my boobies up near my collar bones. Otherwise, they are like curious toddlers, everywhere at once. I can't wear many tops because either the design cuts my boobs in half or I look pornographic. I'm not complaining about having big boobs (ok, well, HH is a little on the ridiculous side) because I do need them to balance out my equally massive hips, but I'm not sure my boobs don't end up making me look even fatter.

My most pressing concern, however, is the newest development: gray hair. I am 29 years old. I only turned 29 in late January. Every day I find new gray hairs. No, not gray hairs. WHITE hair. Every time I look, I find 2 or 3 more. Right now they're mostly underneath, but soon I will be very obviously gray. Soon. My paternal family go gray early. Really early.

Adrian says he still loves me even though I'm going gray. My mom tells me that I can dye it (no I can't...I've developed an allergy to hair dye) and that if it's white hair, it could be really pretty. Umm, not on a 29 year old. Nope. A lovely crown of solid white hair may flatter a 70 year old, but I'm much too young for that to be anything other than haggard and disturbing.

I am speeding toward old ladyhood. I didn't have much in the looks department to begin with and now, at the age of 29, what I DID have is sagging, wrinkling, and changing colors right before my very eyes.

I wanted to be an attractive older lady. Not going to happen. Even with my best efforts, it's all going to be downhill from here.

I hate Cougars. They suck.

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Unfortunately, this tightness is what keeps my boobies up near my collar bones. Otherwise, they are like curious toddlers, everywhere at once.

That is one of the funniest things I've ever read.

I think you're worrying too much...you make it sound like you're changing from young to old lady over night. In my experience, women are much too hard on themselves(read: overexaggerate about bad stuff) when it comes to looks.

~Zoo

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Welcome to aging. It sucks, I know. Been there, done that, knocked out the guy who tried to sell me a t-shirt.

Though, I will admit, it does seem to be hitting you a bit early. I was 38 before I got my first gray hair.

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Zoo:

Unfortunately, this tightness is what keeps my boobies up near my collar bones. Otherwise, they are like curious toddlers, everywhere at once.

That is one of the funniest things I've ever read.

Haha. Glad you liked it.

I agree that women are often far too hard on themselves. Unfortunately, this is a pretty accurate inventory. It just seems like everything is changing so rapidly. Ugh.

Gene:

Welcome to aging. It sucks, I know. Been there, done that, knocked out the guy who tried to sell me a t-shirt.

Heh.

Though, I will admit, it does seem to be hitting you a bit early. I was 38 before I got my first gray hair.

Yeah, no joke. It seems like every negative trait in my family's genetic line got passed on to me.

My mom is nearly 50, and although she says she has a few gray hairs, you definitely can't tell. She's still golden blonde. No wrinkles, either.

I am just not ready for this.

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I'm 24 and I've got greys, hidden by the blonde hair.

Boo.

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Grey hair could be cool as long as you do it up funky (like an anime character) and not like a soccer mom. I've seen several people in their early 20's who have dyed their hair grey or silver. One guy looked like a doof but that was his clothes. Oh, and accessories!

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cactoblasta

Join Date 04/2004

+48

I wouldn't worry too much about your physical looks if I was you. Hotness has never been about how chiselled you are - it's all in the way you hold yourself. If that wasn't the case, most people would never get laid.

As long as you motivate yourself to think you are the shiz, other people will think so too. It's all about the confidence.

Of course, having an appropriate height/weight ratio is a definite positive, but I don't think that's a problem for you unless you've stacked on a tonne of weight recently.

People will overlook almost any physical flaw if they think you're interesting, and interesting = sexy these days. Just think how hot Juno was, and how popular Michael Cero is these days. Neither of them is particularly goodlooking, but lots of people seem to think they're hot.

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Have you had your thyroid checked recently? I know this is a "harp" subject for me...but think about getting it checked, and make sure you get a copy of the lab results.

I was falling apart and went to the Dr, they did a thyroid test and told me it was "normal."

When I didn't feel better, I asked for a copy of all my labs so I could research myself...and guess what? What the military considers "normal" thyroid levels is NOT what civilian endocrinologist and the latest medical research show are normal and healthy.

Thyroid problems tend to show up (if they're going to) in women within a year of birth..however mine didn't start until Gavin was nursing less and less...so about weaning time....or once they get on more solids....

It's a simple blood test....they will check your TSH level...get the actual # and the numbers the labs use as a guide.

Just about every single thing you mentioned can be symptomatic of thyroid disease. If you have obese people in your family, then the chances are a lot more likely its an endocrine disorder.

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There isn't a set in stone "normal" standard. A real endocrinologist uses the lab results as a guide and treats you clinically. Hormones and how they react in your body are very individual. You also have to have a pretty severe hypothyroid to gain much weight. You tend to retain water more, and losing weight is a bit more difficult, but gaining weight isn't a good indication of thyroid problems. If you have gained weight, lost hair, have dry skin and are fatigued, then it could be thyroid related. Thyroid problems in the US are getting more and more frequent due to lack of iodine. People are cutting out salt (great for blood pressure!) but lack iodine due to salt being about the only real iodine source in our diets due to poor soil nutrients from over farming.

TSH is also not all that should be checked for Thyroid. TSH just checks the pituitary gland. You also need to have your T4 tested (they call it a Free T4, or you could get the Free T4 index for the most accurate results).

TW, have you thought of using Henna to cover your grey? There are very few people allergic to it, and it's natural and comes in funky colors if you wish to go that route.

Aging bites, but it's better than the alternative

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I was gonna say something, but somehow I seem to have forgotten what it was.... darned aged brain cells

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Brandie, I've said this before, but in every picture I see of you, you look different. Anytime I get a mental picture of you that goes with the name (I do that with everyone, including characters in books), the next time you post a pic with you in it, that mental pic is erased. I can say this though, I've never seen a pic of you where you didn't look beautiful. I'm not talking "model", air brushed beautiful, but every day, real, honest beauty.

I think what you need to do is quit going by what you see in the mirror and start going by what you see in Adrians eyes when he looks at you, says your name, or even thinks about you. You need to see yourself through the eyes of your kids, who see you as the mostest beautiful, most funnest, bestest mommy in the whole world!

Sabrina made a good point. Your life over the last few years hasn't exactly been stress free. Combat and family separation pay aren't the only things you get when your spouse is deployed.

Tova also made a great suggestion. The thyroid regulates energy levels and proteins. It also has an indirect effect on development. Anytime there is a change in energy or how the body uses proteins, the tyroid should be considered.

Another thing you can do is daily facial exercises. Facial exercises take less time, are easier and have more noticeable effect that any other exercise. Tighten all the muscles in your face and hold it for about 5 seconds. Your mouth will naturally come open, but keep it closed, that way you exercise the muscles that open them, and the ones that you have to used to keep it closed. You'll see the effects in a couple of weeks.

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I have been getting grey hairs since I was 19. I wanted to smack the girl who was doing my hair and told me I found seven ... no, nine grey hairs. Of course, after that I was paranoid and always looking for them. I'm 36 now and still not noticeably grey. I do pluck them when I see them though. I feel you on the breaking out thing too. I have broken out more in the past few years than I ever did in high school.

I still think you're pretty, Tex, and you are too hard on yourself. Just take care of yourself the best you can. I know that smoking can age you prematurely. I don't know if you smoke but I have definately noticed the effect on friends with wrinkles around the eyes and mouth. I'm getting some wrinkles on my forehead and am considering a new hairdo with bangs.

Oh and LW, you totally depressed me.

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KFC Kickin For Christ

Join Date 11/2005

+93

Oh.....to be 29 again!! I remember being really, really depressed when I hit 30! What WAS I thinking?

TW I also started noticing a few gray hairs in my middle 20's and with three small children it didn't go over well. I was actually horrified when my friend plucked out my first gray hair as she stood over and behind me. In the beginning I would pluck those few stray hairs and so this did not really become noticeable until I hit close to 40. Ha! It just got to the point where I couldn't keep up with the plucking them out anymore. I have very dark hair even so I just started coloring when it hit around 39-40 with a very gentle hairdye in the beginning.

Even now I'm basically gray, from what I can tell, only on the crown of my head and around the temples.

As far as the rest goes, getting yourself into a good exercise routine, whatever it is, would be really great for your self image. It sounds like maybe you just need to do some toning. I know I feel so much better about myself when I keep my running and biking schedule not to mention I fit better into my clothing.

As far as the wrinkles go....not much can be done about that but a good skin care routine can do wonders and make you feel better as well. Try a few diff products until you find something you feel works best for you.

We have so many great ladies out there in their 50's 60's and 70's that are still knockouts. If they can keep themselves looking young at these ages we can too at our "younger ages."

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There isn't a set in stone "normal" standard

When it comes to set in stone...I find NOTHING in the medical community fits the catagory..hahaha.

However, in the last decade a series of studies have challenged the "normal" range of 0.4 and 6.0m U/1 for the TSH test.

The American Association of Clinical Endocrinologists (AACE...thats the governing body for all endos in the nation) revised the "normal" range in 2003 and encourages all Endos to treat patients with ranges who aren't from 0.3-3.04m U/1..and there is some indication that anything over a 2.0 can be abnormal.

Heck before TSH tests were even created, Docs went by symptoms. And some Endos are really starting to doubt the veracity of TSH tests.

A real endocrinologist uses the lab results as a guide and treats you clinically.

We're not talking about real Endos we're talking about the military haha....they will give her a TSH test and a free T4, that's it. It took me over a year to get them to run a free T3 test. And they don't treat by diagnosing symptoms....they treat you by your TSH ONLY and usually on the phone...My TSH was 8 the first time (not too high since they cling to the old standard) BUT when I went back four short weeks later it was in the 30's, cholesterol way high, and a host of other issues, not the least of which was weight gain..in four weeks, with no change in diet or exercise..

You tend to retain water more, and losing weight is a bit more difficult, but gaining weight isn't a good indication of thyroid problems.

Losing weight is much more difficult. An under active thyroid slows your metabolism, gives you lower energy, and often leads to depression. These things alone can add the pounds, pack them together and you have a fat chick cocktail. Heh. Thyroid replacement therapy won't make ya skinny, but if you are hypo, it can give you energy to exercise more...or just move more.

Also, sometimes hypothyroid contributes to hypoglycemia which directly promotes weight gain.

Endocrine disorders effect every single cell in your body. Before 1975 women in the US with an under active thyroid took Armour Thyroid, a natural pig thyroid, measured in grains. In 1975 a synthetic T4 was introduced in medical schools across this country...all the sudden Armour Thyroid (which supplies ALL of the hormones our thyroids make) was considered "old." Most Endos won't even CONSIDER using it now...not because it didn't work, but because they were taught in med school Synthetic is better, easier to "regulate", things which were never clinically proven as true (in side by side comparisons)...just stuff the pharmaceutical companies said.

So women went from being able to get all the hormones produced naturally by our thyroid (using pigs) to only one, synthetic T4...and because T4 is supposed to convert to T3 in the body, and the other hormones are considered by products and/or waste (read: they haven't figured what they are used for yet) that was that...we were told we don't need those others.

That is why some women who just take Synthroid still gain weight no matter their diet and still have brain fog and other symptoms. On the website thyroid.about.com there is a lot of useful info if you decide to get some blood work done. And the woman who started the website (Mary) did so because she was a military spouse who couldn't get satisfaction...heh. Her story is on there...as well as several book recommendations.

I don't mean to go on and on, if you read all that, wow. I have a lot of resources and books on this Brandie if you are interested.

But first, THE BLOOD TEST..heh..cause the military won't do anything without it.

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Tova, you don't have to give me that much info, I've had thyroid problems for the past 19 years and have been thyroid free for over 4 years (I had a lobe removed when I was 18, and the rest over 4 years ago).

Armour Thyroid is still prescribed by many Endocrinologists, and is on an uprise due to it being more naturally compatible. Some people will never convert T4, and if you don't have a thyroid, or it is minimally functioning, you need both T3 and T4 to have a properly regulated hormone level, and each have their own half life. I've been on Armour thyroid for over 5 years. Synthroid and other synthetic brands did nothing for me. However, dessicated pig thyroid (Armour) works. It smells really bad, though.

four short weeks later it was in the 30's, cholesterol way high, and a host of other issues, not the least of which was weight gain.

That's typical for thyroids when they start having issues. However, especially since you mentioned cholesterol, it was most likely water weight (ie: retaining water) versus fat. I am still hypothyroid even being on the highest dose they can give me without causing heart problems (my body just isn't using the replacement hormones like it should) but the only reason why I haven't lost weight is because I eat too much and sit on my butt too much.

So, what caused your hypothyroid? If it had that drastic of a change, didn't they look into the root cause? Have they scanned it to see how it is functioning? Auto-immune disease and all sorts of underlying health issues can cause thyroid issues. It's as important to find out why it's not functioning correctly as it is finding out at all. A lot of times it's a symptom of something else, not the problem itself.

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Thanks, everyone.

LW: Very disturbing indeed. I might as well kill myself now.

Tova & Karma: I had my thyroid tested a few months PP after Isabella because I felt I was losing a ridiculous amount of hair. The doctor said it came back normal, so I didn't think of it again.

I tend to be a hypochondriac, so that doesn't help. Don't plant ideas in my head. Haha.

I need to have a check up soon anyways, so it would not hurt to have it tested again, I suppose. I am having a lot of menstrual cramps, not just during my period, so that is something I guess I am kind of concerned about. I think my weight issue is due to a) nursing less,

eating A LOT of fast food while we were in the hotel for a month c) lack of activity/poor eating and d) metabolism slow down with age (I read that 25 is when you start noticing it).

Thanks for all the info.

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Sorry Karma, I like to talk about it because I only discovered this issue about 5 years ago. I can get carried away.

but the only reason why I haven't lost weight is because I eat too much and sit on my butt too much.

Heh, yeah well that will do it too.

Armour Thyroid is still prescribed by many Endocrinologists,

The problem is the military does not consider it a replacement, at all. I fought hard to get it and they always said no (and still say no) ...the pharmacy doesn't even carry it. I won't go into the long battle but in the end, I ordered it from England myself over the counter and started taking it using 2% T3 to 98% T4..which means I take 1 grain of armour and 50mg of Synthroid at night before bed.

I read a book called "What Your Doctor May Not Tell You About Hypothyroidism"...in it Dr Ken Blanchard says women (like you who have no thyroid function and women like me who have little function) often don't do well on just armour because its 20% t3 and 80% T4...he says in his decades of experience that is too much T3...so he treats women with 2% t3 to 98% T4.

So I ordered it at $30 a bottle (!) about three months ago from England and WOW, within two weeks my brain fog was GONE...I was writing again, doing crosswords again, and my energy was rocket hot once again....so I waited for about 6 weeks to make sure it wasn't all in my head, then went back to my Military Endo who got really pissed when I told her how much better I felt....she refused to treat me and gave me a referral to a civilian off base (which is what I wanted)

He also does not typically prescribe armour...but he is from India and pretty open minded, when I told him how it was really helping me, he asked me the name of the book by Blanchard and basically told me, he wants me to feel good no matter what...he is open to what works for me, not what the numbers say. WOOT.

There I go again....but this was a huge huge battle...military Drs poo poo me and throw anti depressants at me (Which I hate with a passion) ...everytime I went to the endo I knew more than she did, because I was/am reading all the literature.

They say it was having my last kid. But I wonder. I'd love to have it scanned...hahaha...but every Endo I've seen says there is no reason...they do blood work (and the military only treats according to TSH). I don't have a goiter or any pain usually, though a few days off and its weird to swallow. I was tested for Hashimoto's (-sp).

The weight thing for me totally sux.

I've always been athletic, and strong. I do cardio, lift weights, and I don't usually sit still for too long....but nothing really seems to matter....I can maintain as long as I stay active and working out...the minute I stop, hello to the poundage. I was sick for about a week last month, I didn't work out because recovery time is already doubled with the thyroid issue, but when I'm sick...its really bad. In seven days I gained 4 pounds...and I wasn't really eating anything but soup, low sodium tomato soup to be exact..heh.

I will look into the water retention thing. You know I went off the pill because it was driving my blood pressure through the roof. The cholesterol thing is hereditary..I can't believe I held off as long as I have without being high. Most of the people on both sides of my family start on chol. drugs in their teens, in puberty. My twelve year old is borderline, and I think puberty may push him over....I hope not, hoping my husband's genes will help out.

I didn't know water retention and chol. are related though.

Very interesting. I am going to look into that more....

Sorry Tex for highjacking...I know thyroid talk is BORING to people who have a healthy one...

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lack of activity/poor eating and d) metabolism slow down with age (I read that 25 is when you start noticing it).

Tex, I don't think this is true? Maybe an old wives tale. I will be 40 in September and never gained weight because I was getting older.

My endo says you don't just gain weight because you get older...you will lose muscle mass in your 30's if you aren't doing something to prevent it...which means your metabolism slows and that can help add it on.

Have your thyroid checked and be sure to ask for your TSH number. Studies show women who are borderline often benefit tremendously from treatment.

And you said your nursing less....that's when mine showed up.

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I'm sure you're right.

Heh, I know, I know, I need to get on the ball with exercise. I have great intentions and all sorts of things at my disposal to do it. I just don't. Ugh.

I will actually be seeing a civilian doctor, btw. Adrian had me and the kids get docs off post. I will definitely ask about it.

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I will actually be seeing a civilian doctor, btw. Adrian had me and the kids get docs off post. I will definitely ask about it.

WOO HOO...that's already a step toward wellness.

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When all else fails...photoshop.

As for the off post drs vrs on post....I was hit by a sudden unexplainable gut wrenching pain yesterday at 3 pm. I could barely breath cause it hurt so bad and it still aches even with the nice happy drugs they gave me.

The apt line told me there were no more appointements, but fortuanatly, I know my way around the system....and I got in.

I have thought about going off post but I don't know any tricks to avoid a trip to the ER if they have no apts.

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Tova: Ha, we'll see!

LH: Hahaha, as you well know, I am BEYOND photoshop! LOL.

Are you ok? Nothing serious?

I don't mind seeing a military doc, but apparently Adrian would rather us go off-post (he had been told that the clinics here were waaaay overcrowded and it is really difficult to get in).

My plan is just to not get sick ever.

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My plan is just to not get sick ever.

That's the plan I go with, and so far, it's worked. And if it hasn't, I wouldn't know because there's nobody to tell me any different!

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I got nothing to add except I think you're a gorgeous person, regardless of how you look.

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Jythier: LOL. I understand completely.

Maso: Thank you. I vacillate between thinking I am ok and loathing myself entirely. I am guessing I should strive for a happy medium, haha.

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I am guessing I should strive for a happy medium, haha.

Or maybe even a medium well-done...

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