With each breath came a sob that shook her bed. In the dark she lay on this cold Sunday night, pillow wet. Contimplating her feelings, contimplating their past. She wondered how it started and where it would end. She was hurting. Picking up her phone and listening to the message she knew would be there, tears streaming down her face. It's not the first time he'd hurt her, and she's sure it wouldn't be the last. She didn't know when to trust him and when to not. She knew that the white lies weren't a big deal, but the fact that they were lies made her sick. She just knew that she loved him and she just knew what they had, and what they still have. She knew she wanted to trust, she wanted a happy ending.
She thought about her options and realized there were only two. Either walk away when the hurt got unbearable and the foundation was no longer there. Walk away and be hurt. Walk away, cry, and make him cry.
But, the more she thought about it the more she realized how truly sorry he was. She realized that he loved her so much, and cherished the fact that he wouldn't let her go easily. So her second option was to start over with that boy. Move on and try to re-build a broken foundation. It would hurt. Either way it would. But he wasn't ready to let her go, and she knew he could do better.
She didn't realize why she got so emotional and reacted the way she did. She didn't realize why it hurt so much. But, she was willing to move past it and put it behind them. She knew no one was perfect and she knew that she loved him.
~Sarah
