I ain't got a home
My sister used to say that "life is what happens while you're making plans"...
and as the years have wandered by, that is one of the truest sayings for me.
This morning finds me baking a cake for my son's girlfriend, it's her birthday today. I realized I wished it was for my older sister, who has been very sick now for months.
Seems like people, time, and all the good thing in life, are falling away, leaving..and no matter how hard I try I can't hang onto them.
It doesn't help when people come into my home ( professionals ) to help me and they are thoughtless with their comments, their questions, as if I was a number or another case to be filed at the end of the day.
Just yesterday a worker asked me "don't you feel old"? after she looked at a picture of my son and me, one of his graduation photos, from 1995. How cold that was and thoughtless... sometimes ya know I jump from a frying pan into the fire....I HAD a different worker and I let her go because she was a "know it all" who told me how wrong I was with things I was doing or not doing....what's wrong these people?? If I had their job I would value the customer and honor their requests, their directions in regards to their home.
My own health has taken a turn for the worse, and moving out of this apt. is necessary for me. There are 7 smokers on this wing of 12 units, even my C-Pap equipment turns yellow after only a couple of months. The doctors, nurses, and other medical people have urged me to move. So I'm packed, somewhat, and have NO idea where I want to live. That's the hardest choice for me to make, for I have no idea where home is anymore....such a sad feeling...I can't "go back home" because no one is left in Chippewa Falls, well I guess there is a cousin or two there...however it's too far from my son, that would make visits impossible.
And so it goes, one foot in front of the other, one step at a time...and hope for the best while trying to make it better...God Bless all of you, til next time..