1. Pull your droopy pants up. You look like an idiot.
2. Let's get this straight; it's called a "gravel road." I drive a pickup truck because I want to. No matter how slow you drive, you're going to get dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the way.
3. They are cows & fishing lakes. That's what they smell like to you. They smell like money to us. Get over it.
4. So you have a $60,000 car. We're impressed. We have $250,000 combines that are driven only 3 times a year.
5. So every person in every pickup waves. It's called being friendly. Try to understand the concept.
6. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of ducks are coming in, we WILL shoot it out of your hand. You better hope you don't have it up to your ear at the time.
7 Yeah, we eat walleye & pike and love it. You really want sushi & caviar? It's available at the corner bait shop.
8. The "Opener" refers to the first day of deer season. It's a religious holiday held the Saturday before 'Thanksgiving' .
9. We open doors for women. That is applied to all women, regardless of age.
10. No, there's no "vegetarian special" on the menu. Order steak. Or you can order the Chef's Salad, and pick off the pound of ham & turkey.
11. When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes: meats, vegetables, and breads. We use three spices: Onion, Pepper, and Garlic!Oh, yeah... We don't care what you folks in Cincinnati call that stuff you eat... It ain't real lutefisk. And real lutefisk never met a tomato!
12. You bring "coke" into my house, it better be brown, wet, and served over ice. You bring "Mary Jane" into my house, she better be cute, know how to shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.
13. College and high school football is as important here as the Lakers and the Knicks, and a heck of a lot more fun to watch.
14. Yeah, we have golf courses. But don't hit the water hazards --it spooks the fish.
15. Colleges? Try MSOE, Carroll, Marquette , UW (all campuses), etc.They come outta there with an education plus a love for God and country, and they still wave at passing pickups when they come home for the holidays.
16. We have more folks in the Army, Navy, Air Force, and Marines, than any other state, so "Don't screw with Wisconsin ." If you do, you will get whipped by the best.
17. Always remember what a great mind once said: "The United States wouldn't be what it is today if it had not been for Wisconsin !" Wisconsin is the greatest state ever!!
I have my addition to this: We're able to spot wild asparagus growing along the roadside while traveling 60 mph.
Even though I"ve lived in MN. since 1976, I"m still a "cheddarhead" at heart, still love the pine trees, the lakes, the people and the ways of small WI. towns...
We have small towns here in MN. however it just isn't the same....guess once a "Wisconsinite" always a cheddarhead